It seems to be a constant learning experience, testing our boundaries of humanness. We were put on earth by a Diety which people offer many names to, I call God. But I believe that God is actually a force of love so great that is was able to create.
So that we weren't puppeteered throughout our journey, we were given choices. The first spiritually created humans failed in their choices and we became inherently imperfect.
I believe there are two types of "love" that we know. The first is the more common human "love" which I don't really define as love at all……even though it can be quite enjoyable and exciting to the soul. That love is the one we feel when we first meet a potential partner, it's the passion, excitement of being "in love". It is when someone validates our worth as a person, and fills our needs, as imperfect humans, we all have these needs, the need to feel wanted or valued by someone else, the need for physical affection and for someone to dedicate their time to us. Sadly this type of "in love" feeling is so deceptive and it usually lasts anywhere from six months to three years. But it also has a very special purpose. It gives us time and the will to dedicate ourselves to someone else. It gets us together long enough to take the opportunity to really get to know someone and get down to the business of real loving.
Real loving is that God type loving. It is as Corinthians says "patient and kind, not boastful or rude, it does not rejoice in the wrongs……." Some people go from the emotional "in love" type feeling to a deeper spiritual love and others continue to have both, either at the beginning of a relationship or after a few years it is developed
I guess I find M Scott Peck defined it best in "The Road Less Traveled" when he said "Love is the will to extend oneself for one's own or another's spiritual growth"
I think we have two types of love. The emotional "in love" feeling which most of us experience in life; and the deeper type of spiritual love which is similar to what Peck described. That type of love is usually more peaceful, and less of a high feeling. It is the type that is constantly seeking to learn and to grow and looks at the world in wonder. That type of love continually questions, not in an agitated sense, but realises that for every question there a myriad of answers. And it is accepting of many of the great mysteries of life, but never ceases to ask why.
The "in love" feeling satisfies our own human needs. In many ways it is quite selfish. The genuine spiritual love satisfies the needs of the spirit and all spirits related to it in the universe. It is more giving but not at the expense of itself because it realises that its own spirit is part of God. If this type of love is experienced by two partners, it offers an incredible opportunity for mutual growth.
Humanness means that we will always have the emotional charges which affect our judgement and our actions. I guess I feel that it's a difficult balance between the two types of love when you have both. Because the emotional love tends to sabotage the spiritual love by its own selfish needs. It requires constant checking to ensure that the selfishness of emotional love doesn't engulf the spiritual goal, a greater communion with God.
Why do you stop loving? I don't think the spirit ever stops loving the spirit of God it recognises in others. To do so means to deny God. Certainly the other type of love can stop, that passion which is felt for a partner can and will subside often when the needs are no longer as strong. Peck describes it as the "ego boundaries" snapping back into place. Perhaps it is when the boundaries come back that we become more selfish and are unable to extend ourselves as much for another.